So, this “trainer thought of the day” post was going to go straight to FB but one thought became many and decided to make this go on my web-page….because it’s a bit of a rant.
So, I’ll get right to it.
But first, I want to thank all my clients and everyone who has referred people to my business this past month or so. My schedule is filling up quite nicely. I’ve never been happier to give up some of my naptime. HAHA
Seriously though, if you know me you know that I take anywhere from 1-3 naps a day. I know for most of you it may seem like gloating, but you have to understand when you have anywhere from 3-8 hours of downtime, you’re gonna nap.
If you work/have worked with me before, you know by now that I don’t work with just anybody that asks for my training services. I’ve recognized that with my schedule filling up, my time becomes more and more valuable…and so should the quality of my clientele.
Recently, I had a conversation with someone that wanted to get started strength training….BUT they “didn’t want to look like a man….”. If you’re reading this, you know how annoyed I was with this statement. 90%+ of my clients are women. You can imagine the amount of shared concern most of them had before having me train with them. It’s not the person that I’m annoyed with.
It’s the perception that women (and men) have about what it means to be strong. So…I’m going to write this to those who believe in this mindset and in the best format possible: Bullet Points.
**CAUTION: IF YOU READ THIS AND YOU DON’T KNOW ME, THIS MIGHT OFFEND YOU. IT CLEARLY MEANS YOU’RE NOT INTERESTED IN HEARING THE MESSAGE I’M SHARING AND ONLY INTERESTED IN LETTING YOUR FEELINGS/EMOTIONS TAKE OVER. DON’T WORRY. I WON’T LOSE ANY SLEEP OVER YOU.**
- There are enough women in the world who lift weights and you’re likely friends with one or know a woman who lifts weights. I need you to look at them or find a recent photo of them right now and ask yourself: Does she look like a man? Most likely the answer will be a resounding NO. That alone should debunk the idiotic ideology you chose to believe in.
- If you’re a woman who believes in this mindset, I don’t think you’re doing the image of women any favors. This is an uninformed belief. A belief commonly held by those who are scared of the things they don’t understand.
- You want to get a nice ass…a “toned (insert body part here)”? You lift appreciable weights. That means relatively heavy. End of story.
- If you lift weights and decide that you have “man shoulders/back/arms/legs/etc” please be sure to stand next to an actual man to see if that is true. If that is the case, I know a handful of dudes that could be doing what you’re doing right now because if you look more manly than they do, then I need you to reach out to them and hook them up. The state of man is in jeopardy. We need you to show us the way because you clearly have this “looking like a man” thing figured out.
- Focusing on more of what you don’t want rather than what you do want keeps you from getting actual results simply because your outlook is negative. Positive mindset? Positive results. Amazing how that works.
- You are a “basic bitch”. I know. Calling a woman a bitch of any kind is a sin. I get it-it’s like calling a black person the N word if you’re not black; it’s totally different if it’s anyone else. Anyways, If you don’t know what a basic bitch is, it’s sumed up as “someone who does what everyone else is doing and isn’t their own person at all.” If you’re okay with being a basic bitch, that’s totally okay (there are also “basic bros” for the …bros). That being said….
- If you’re a woman and you lift, to me you’re not basic….you’re a “bad ass bitch” (AKA Bad Bitch): “Now a bad bitch is a woman who handles her business without making it seem like business….“Having the mindset that you can do anything and everything you want to in this world even if everyone tells you no you can’t do it and you say YES I CAN, WATCH ME. Having a bad bitch mentality is now considered a positive trait. Girls with a (BBM) Bad Bitch Mentality are a powerhouse and a force to be reckoned with. If you have a bad bitch mentality, you have the mentality that you will get to the top, you will succeed and you will win the game of life. Girls with a Bad Bitch Mentality go farther, stronger, harder and always come out on top because they NEVER stop. They NEVER give up and that is why they succeed….” Damn that was beautiful!! These are the kind of women I work with. Just look at my professional page on FB. You’ll see what I mean.
- Finally…it’s not your fault for thinking this way. Everything you’ve ever known has been taught by someone of authority or someone you respect. It is hard to admit sometimes that everything you’ve learned is utter bullshit. It is hard to question it. With what we know today to be physically and scientifically unfounded about women and lifting weights becoming “men”, it shouldn’t be hard to shut that shit down. Though, we seriously underestimate our own psychology and how reinforcement for decades of the wrong thing can dictate what we choose to believe. I can’t tell you what to believe, BUT make sure whatever you believe in gives you confidence,, happiness, and positive self-image, and appreciate other people’s hard work.
Okay. I’m done. Have a nice day!!
Strength in Iron,